(What) Would You Rate Yourself?

Today I had a huge wake up call that really got me thinking about society and judgement when my soccer coach was very unhappy with our team's performance. Instead of screaming at us at the end of the game, he took a pen and a piece of paper and wrote down every girl's name and gave them a number and a comment.  Each girl received a number on a scale from one to ten that rated our individual efforts with a comment beside it, mostly saying what we had done wrong.  Receiving a five meant that you were at your average ability of play; one girl received a five, while only one other received higher than a five.  Needless to say, it was not the best showcase of our abilities. Many of my teammates were very clearly upset and there really was not any chatter as we all walked off the field, lost in our own thoughts.  Everyone I'm sure, was going over every last detail of the game and thinking about how they played and what they could've done to make a greater impact on the game. Being presented with those numbers and few words, made me wonder about why we judge and rate ourselves and others.

Not only did what my coach did get me thinking about myself, but it also got me thinking of others on my team.  It is so interesting to see how quickly people turn to judge others.  Especially in a group of 20 or so sixteen year old girls, I am sure there were plenty of negative thoughts and feelings of resentment for some girls who thought they should have received higher scores.  It got me thinking that people don't take judgements into consideration to see if they can change or improve, instead they ball it up inside and get angry about why they were judged.  I wanted to be able to take what my coach said and try to improve my game, instead of being angry or bitter about it.  However, in true teenage girl fashion, it is very hard not to be offended when someone says something negatively towards you.  It is much easier said then done to just brush it off and pretend like the words don't have any impact. So naturally, the easiest thing is to point the finger and put the blame on somebody else and say, it's her fault that we lost.  But in reality, we are just targeting those others, to cover up for our own mistakes or maybe even guilts.

I thought that this was very similar to how we objectify celebrities.  Celebrities are constantly in the spot light and always have a camera pointed their way, or somebody trying to get the dirt on them. We point the finger at them and emphasize what they have done wrong. Recently, Jennifer Lawrence and Kate Upton both had nude photos hacked from their own personal devices.  The media has exploited them and are even going to such sickening extents as to put them in a life size exhibit.  However, what most of the public seems to be obsessing over is the fact that they even had these photos in the first place.  Why would they take that picture and have it on their phone? They know they are celebrities, they should be way more careful with what they do. "Dear Ms. Lawrence, its your own stupid damn fault."  The judgements are brutal and they are endless. But as that second article goes on to say, celebrities are human, too.  They just have more eyes watching their every move so that the second they make one mistake, everyone knows it.  The title says it all; Why Do We Consider Hurting Celebrities 'Fair Game'?  Is it really necessary that the hackers expose these personal photographs and create even more controversy and judgment that these women will have to deal with? The media is fueled by judgements and gossip from the mistakes celebrities make.  But we are all human, we all make mistakes.  Is it possible that we could be projecting our feelings of guilt or hiding our mistakes in the wake of those who are more famous? Could we be judging our celebrities and putting the blame on them, just the same as my teammates judged and blamed one another after the game?

Thinking back on my number, I was upset at first.  I thought it was so dumb and I questioned why would my coach ever give us those ratings and comments. After thinking a lot about it, as much as it seemed obnoxious or rude, all of it was true.  Having someone else rate me got me thinking, it really caused me to reflect and think about what I would have rated myself.  Now I am curious to see if others would reflect on their judgments and their actions and learn from it, or if they are hiding behind the truth.  What would you rate yourself?